The human brain has an incredible capacity for innovation, inspiration and greatness; It can also cripple those who appear strong on the outside with intense feelings of self doubt and a shattered confidence on the inside. For the last year, I have been struggling with the latter. I have talked myself out of acting on so many ideas its embarrassing for me to admit. Blogging is just one of those ideas.
Christina and I stopped writing our blog a few years ago mostly because of me. We were writing a lot about politics at the time and I was becoming negative. I didn’t like that – I am usually very positive and I wanted to get back to my true self.
We totally stepped away from politics for a while. I finally took and completed my Executive MBA, an achievement I’m proud of. I quit a high paying and relatively easy job as Vice President with Merit Contractors Association; I was getting negative in that job as well because I was lobbying government for changes I believe strongly in and I was fighting with a lot of people. I wanted to stop fighting.
Christina and I recently welcomed beautiful twin boys into the world and we are now trying to make a living though our company, CIPR Communications – its been going fairly well, but I’ve doubted myself a lot in the transition from employee to entrepreneur. Its been difficult
My life is completely different now than it was then. In many ways, its so much better but in some ways, its worse. That damned self doubt and lack of confidence seems to have crept into my life and it has stopped me from acting on many of the things I dream about achieving and want in my life.
So strange the human mind – the internal battles we have with ourselves. We watch people we admire and want to be more like them. We tell ourselves that tomorrow we will do this and that toward our goals and then we do nothing. We feel crippled. Stuck. Weak. Defeated. WTF?
I post this blog today as a first step away from self doubt and diminished confidence. Its my way to turn my ideas into action. I’m blogging again because I like to write. I find it therapeutic – I learned this when I wrote my late mother’s eulogy. I am blogging again because I want to.
Maybe this blog is a confession. Maybe it’s a declaration. Maybe its an internal call to action. I don’t know and I don’t think it matters.
I am reviving PCinYYC with a renewed focus. Much less about politics and much more about life. Life as an entrepreneur trying desperately and shamelessly to build a business around the lifestyle I want. Life as a dad to twin boys who wants to be a positive inspiration for those little bundles of amazingness. Life as a human being going through the constant ups and downs that define the human experience.
These are the things I will write about and I hope that you will join me in this journey. I hope that you will comment and share your thoughts, wisdom, struggles and achievements. I hope that together we can overcome and we can celebrate all of the greatness that has yet to be discovered.